Welcome to the website of Beat Them Brewing Company. We are the Supreme of craft breweries–if you can find our products, sell them on eBay at a profit.
We are a really tiny brewery based in New Jersey. Founded in 2012, we make beer about twice a year. To learn more about Beat Them, toggle through the pages on our website. If you make it as far as the Defeat Them page, you are a remarkably patient and tolerant person.
Greet Them is a photographic journey through each Beat Them beer.
Meet Them is the true story about the men behind the beer.
Eat Them explains how we sometimes make bread/paperweights/doorstops using the spent grains from our brewing.
Entreat Them is where lawyers can start when their clients decide to sue us. The page also has contact information and other stuff.
Indiscreet Them features many of our failed advertising campaigns and the limited merchandise that we could never sell.
Repeat Them tells the history of Beat Them Brewing Co. one brewing session at a time.
Tweet Them is just a page with a link to our Twitter account. It rhymes with Beat Them. Have you noticed a pattern?
Obsolete Them is just a page with a link to our Facebook account. If you are a millennial, hit us up on Snapchat and we’ll explain what Facebook is. (Hint: It’s like Myspace, but not as cool.).
Defeat Them contains all of the girls club volleyball videos that brought you here in the first place. Girls volleyball was, of course, the inspiration for Beat Them Brewing Co. If you’ve watch girls club volleyball as a parent, you know the critical role that beer plays. It’s enough to make you want to brew your own.